I am STILL laughing over Corey’s choice of words when he was frustrated with Leah about moving into a new trailer with an actual bathtub. I don’t know why it struck me as so hilarious, but it did, so deal with it. I’m catching up with Jenelle and the gang today, so I’m gonna sum up the past few episodes here and now.
OK – I don’t particularly like Leah, but the scene with her having to bathe her twins in some basement where the water (most likely the dirty water that’s draining from the dishwasher above them) falls from the ceiling into the spider-filled tub is downright depressing. If she has to shower there, whatever, but those kids don’t deserve that. Plus, the rest of their trailer isn’t too superb. I mean, I remember they were so excited when they moved in, but I couldn’t get my mind off of the public blue ‘men’ sign on the bathroom door. What was that trailer before it was converted into a house? Anyway…Leah’s mom finds them a new trailer that they’re supposed to move into, and that’s what the argument is over when Corey yells in frustration – “Jesusgod, LEAH!” I was so proud of him. Not for denying his girls a decent home -excuse me – trailer to grow up in, but for finally getting downright pissed at Leah. This is the guy that basically had her as a booty call before she got knocked up with twins within a month, and brought MTV into their lives. Next thing you know, she has the babies and cheats on him as soon as she looses the little bit of weight she gained. She pleads and cries for half the first season to get back together, so he marries her and expects her to be a typical ‘housewife’. She gets bored, gets a job, then gets sick of the job (and most likely got her payout from MTV) and cuts down to 1 day a week. That must have made her bored, because in the most recent episode we find out that she cheated AGAIN, with the same dude, a week before the wedding. She actually says Corey is being irrational for not speaking to her and wanting to break up – but wasn’t SHE the one who cheated on him?! That was kind of irrational, right? Jesusgod, LEAH! The rest of the time, we have each of them tediously talking to all of their friends and family about what happened, and playing ‘who gets to file for divorce first’. Leah wins and acts like she’s sad about it. Personally, I think Corey should get the twin that looks like him (the glasses kid) Leah should get her clone, and they retreat to their respective trailers and live their lives.
Kailyn (well, Jo) is the second funniest. Jo feels he simply must meet Jordan a cool 8 months after Jordan and Kailyn started dating, because he wants to know who’s hangin out around his kid. Oddly enough, Jo also has some musical showcases and a – get this – music video coming up. I’m sure him wanting some more airtime on MTV has NOTHING to do with him making these sweet musical moves. What I want to know is why the extra 30 minutes in this episode was more focused on the demise of Corey and Leah and not dedicated to Jo’s rap career?? I feel cheated. We only get a hint of him rapping in a scene where Kailyn is lovingly playing recording of Jo rapping for some black guy (since black guys are the ultimate judges on who can and cannot rap), asking his opinion. Black guy basically laughs. I don’t think he gave him a fair chance. I guess the bigger storyline here is that Jo and Kailyn are remembering why they were attracted to each other’s beastly-ness in the first place. I swear, it’s his rapping. Women can’t resist a skilled musician. She ‘accidentally’ tells Jo she loves him while saying goodbye, and next thing we know, they’re getting it on after giving Issac a bath. Something about bathing their child at age 19 must make them remember the spark they used to have that got them on this show in the first place. I really have to switch stories, because I have a vivid imagination, and the thought of those two is not appealing in any aspect…
Jenelle let me down. She whined for the past 3 episodes about having to give up weed and Kieffer. I can almost understand weed – but Kieffer? Darling, he’s homeless. You pick him up everyday from a hill on the side of the road. He’s forever wearing that green sweater and must smell, well, homeless. Don’t let the fact that he has FB and a cell phone fool you – he’s still…homeless. Don’t think for a minute that the reason Jenelle is giving up her favorite vices is because she’s maturing and making good decisions – she’s on 12 month probation. Basically, if she stays clean, she gets no mark on her record. I forget what this whole thing is even over. I remember Kieffer getting physical with her a few times, but I’m drawing a blank as to why he seems scott-free while she’s in trouble. Whatever. She decides rehab is the place for her, and that’s pretty much all that happens with my favorite Teen Mom. I’m racking my brain for anything else that happened with her, but again, nothing.
Well, that’s everyone – wait – 1, 2, 3, I’m missing someone. Ooh, right. Chelsea. It’s the end of the season, so of course Adam chooses to go back into hiding and breaks up with Miss White Hair. She can’t understand why she loves someone who doesn’t love her, but I think it’s obvious. When you’ve been raised by a man who gives in to your every demand, and who seems to do more for you the more you disappoint him, you come to expect it. Adam probably feels the way I do about her – she’s simply a spoiled, stupid girl, and when the cameras aren’t around, he sees no benefit to being with her. Other than that, a mere 2 years after high school graduation, Chelsea starts to take her GED test. She passes the first of 5 portions of the test, and….thankfully, that’s all we get of her. The combination of orange skin and white hair was just about as nauseating as thinking of Jo and Kailyn gettin it on.
Next week is the finale – aren’t you excited? I’m personally sitting on the edge of my seat. OK, not really. But a big part of me is really excited that this season is almost over. Jesusgod!!